Category: ramble

just thinking, like on a page.

Actual Conversation at Casa de Wellman- Where’s my dinner, woman? edition

~ curiousreadings

There’s a certain ritual that ensues here at the casa… and it happens, well, not every night, but pretty damn close.

Tonight, the bloody man threw me a curveball I didn’t appreciate.

 

Rick- So, what are we doing about the food situation?

Me, sighing- What, already?

Rick- It’s five o’clock, we last ate at 11am.

Me- so what do you want? (Just knowing that the next question will be ‘what are my options?’

Rick, distracted by text message from Home Despot, we talk about order pickup for a few minutes before circling back.

Rick- you know what I’m going to ask.

Me- ANYTHING YOU WANT TO PUT IN YOUR FUCKING MOUTH HOLE, SIR!

Rick, blinking mildly- I was going to ask if you wanted to cook or order something.

Me- That’s not fair! That’s cheating! You switched it up on me! That’s not okay!

Cue the inevitable hysterical laughter before we order a pizza.

We really need the lockdown to be over. We entertain ourselves waaaaaay too well.

 

Actual conversation at Casa de Wellman- when our tech is smarter than us edition

~ curiousreadings

Thanks to covid or the rona or the effects of Sweet Potato Hitler’s stupidity, however you like to phrase it, we’ve been puttering around on our little projects over the past few weeks. Lucky me, I’m high risk, so I’ve been in my home or, on two memorable occasions in Rick’s truck for a month now.

When we bought this place, I was charmed by the idea that I, Ari Wellman, had a courtyard. It sounded so classy and I wondered whatever we should do with the space to really make it special.

Well, for about 8 years, absofreakinlutely nothing. There are planter cutouts in the middle, and occasionally I’d try playing something in them to see if it took. Roses didn’t, mint and morning glories did.

The problem with sitting there in the summertime was that there was no shade.. and all fully enclosed concrete walled space in summer in New Mexico without shade.. bah HA to using that brick oven to sit in and sip wine after April 1. So it kind of became a dumping ground for anything that probably should have gone to the trash or the garage but just wasn’t.

A couple of years ago, I decided this wasn’t going to get it. I bought a pair of pergolas, one to go on each side of the walkway, some basic furniture, and decreed that we would by god USE the courtyard. I even got a gate for the front so our pups could come hang out with us.

The next year, I added a container garden and a fire pit. And don’t get me wrong, it’s nice… but there was still just something missing.

I know some of you are going, omfg Ari, could you get to the funny little chat with Rick and stahhhp.

No, I can’t. This is my courtyard and I love it.

So I sat and thought for awhile- part of the problem was that there was too much blank, tan canvas at eye level.. needed to break that up. Not enough greenery, needed to get more container stuff, but in a way it was at eye level instead of ground level.

And I wanted to do something whimsical with light.

OK, cue tapestry hangings to break up all the tan on the walls, a new planter with a trellis for the english ivy to climb, a repurposed plant stand to sit in the corner, and a few small pieces of dragon statuary, cause fuck, this is MY courtyard, right?

I figured all of this would create more of a lush Aladdin’s cave garden feel to it, so why not have some magical floating lights? I tried hanging some battery powered Mason jar lights and really liked the effect- but I’m lazy so I wanted something more automated and energy efficient.

Cue me buying up a bunch of fairy light solar inserts for Mason jars with little metal hangers. And me turning each one on only to find they only lit up for a split second, if at all.

Me- WTF is this? I wasted my money, none of these are staying lit.

Rick- the wires seem pretty flimsy and thin.. could it be a break?

Me- don’t think I won’t get a voltmeter and check.

Rick, possibly not wanting me into his tool set, but still snickering- maybe they just need to charge up.

 

OK, fiiiine. I spread all the little lids out on the table in the sun to soak up all that power up juice and went back to them yesterday evening.

 

Me- they still aren’t freaking lighting. Grab me a regular triple A, would you?

Rick- they definitely got enough sun!

Me- and it won’t even light up with the triple A! OMG, I’ve wasted money and a bunch of time on these bitchly things. /puts down jar on the table with a sigh, goes back to other errands, like using a shop vac to clean the stone.

 

After dark-

Rick- Uh.. they are all lit up now

Me- WHAT?!

We both stood in the doorway and stared as every jar we’d put together was twinkling at us merrily.

 

Rick- Oh my god… they are smart enough to only light up when it’s dark.

Me- so the few that lit for a second-

Rick- your hand must have been over the sensor, so it thought it was dark.

Me- well. shit. We have 8 more jars to do, then.

Rick- it’s a bitch when the tech is smarter than we are.

And, being us, we got to the point of laughing at ourselves over it.

 

This morning, I caught Rick sitting down to the computer with the manual to the new washer in it.

 

Me- what are you up to?

Rick- figuring out how to use the new washer- did you know it weighs each load to insure the appropriate wash time?

Me- oh hell.. you’re never going to know when the washer is done! Wait, isn’t that the one that has bluetooth?

Rick, nodding- yeah, it’ll tell me when it’s done, I think. I haven’t gotten to that part yet. It’s usually the dryer I time by anyway.

Me- soooo.. I need to get you a smarter dryer…

Rick, muttering something about stupid smart tech.

 

So yeah, don’t worry about us, we’re doing okay and finding out just how smart we’re not… cause sometimes we’re the better idiot that this stuff was built to outwit.

Actual conversation at Casa de Wellman- the rum is muthableepin gone, yall edition

~ curiousreadings ~ 3 Comments

Not only IS the rum gone, but it’s actually been gone for awhile. The only beer in the fridge is Bud Light (/herk), the liquor in the cabinets is either the really high end stuff we keep on hand for select guests or those spur of the moment purchases that weren’t that great an idea after all. Generic limoncello is just not okay.

Even the last jar of ‘shine is down to the dregs. It’s scary times, yall.

So while I was sitting on the couch, mulling this predicament, it occurred to me to wonder if Total Wine did curbside pickup.

And it turns out they do! they do do curbside pickup!

Feverishly, I begin inputting my order on my phone- I had to hit a five o clock deadline to get it tomorrow, and who knows? Maybe if I really hurried I could lie in the sweet arms of Bacchus tonight?!

Me- I GOT WINE! AND RUM! AND MARGARITAS!

Rick- I still haven’t agreed to do this pick up for you, you know.

Me, eyeing Rick with laser focused attention and cold calculation- You know what they say, dear. Happy wife, happy life.

Rick- /sigh

 

And ladies and gents… not even an hour later, that sweetest of sounds came to my ears.

 

Rick- I got a text, your order is ready for pickup.

Me, batting lashes- I love you…

Rick- /sigh I’m going, I’m going.

 

He’s a smart, smart man that Rick of mine.

The Journals of Nessa- so what’s this all about?

~ curiousreadings

As of now (if all the automated glory of the internets works the way it’s supposed to), The Journals of Nessa series is available, as a whole, for half off. That’s $5 for three books.

These are the books that I came back from over ten years of not writing at all to create Nessa- and it had that feeling like she’d really been with me all along. I’d gone through a lot of personal upheaval and knew intimately how hard it is to find who you are while trying to navigate the world.

So, all of that became Nessa- sometimes funny and wry, sometimes afraid, all explored through journal entries that let me get to know her and myself a little bit better. I won’t lie, I both laughed and cried as a wrote them, and I hope my readers do the same.

It’s not a perfect story, but I feel like it’s a good story, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get a warm little glow every time I see more folks have decided to take a chance on it.. on me, and on Nessa.

If by any luck you happen to be reading this, I hope you might take a chance on us yourself.

And if that doesn’t sound like your thing, or $5 is a little dear right now, I’m also offering The Way of the Fae for free this weekend. This is my first post-Nessa work; I decided to have some fun by telling some lesser known fairy tales from a different viewpoint- What if the elves from the Elves and the Shoemaker were wiseguys? What if Falada the Horse from the Goose Girl was a fae trapped in a horse’s body?

What does the story look like from Baba Yaga’s perspective?

Again, had fun writing it, and think there’s some laughs for the reader, too.

Thanks for giving me this little chunk of your time… I hope you’ll consider coming a little further.

So, did you like the ebook promotions so far? How about a few more?

~ curiousreadings

Here’s what I’m doing this weekend-

The Way of the Fae- A History in Tales by [Wellman, Ari]

The Way of the Fae will be available Friday through Sunday night for free! Ever wondered what the stories would sound like if the fairies told them?

And if you’ve enjoyed The Witch’s Daughter- well, now I’m offering the whole series for half off ($5) from Saturday til Monday!

From the Journals of Nessa Ysbelle– all three books in one volume.

It’s not much, but I hope these stories help folks be somewhere else, even if it’s just for a little while.

When there’s no easy answers…

~ curiousreadings

We. HATE. Complexity.

It’s true… ninety nine times out of a hundred, if you’ve got an easy fix that will patch over a problem versus the more convoluted, difficult fix that you may not fully understand that will take care a problem more permanently, you’re probably going to advocate for the easy fix you understand.

It’s human nature.

The problem is, when it comes to people, we want to think that we have the fix that everyone can use! One size fits all, easy to apply, just do this, send this letter on to five other people, blah blah freakin blah.

Everyone walks their own path, everyone’s got their own problems, and those problems can have some way different solutions. One of those bigger problems we have as a society is our complete inability to let people walk their own damn path- and advocating for or against things that have absolutely no impact in their own small world.

Image result for if you don't like gay marriage don't have one

So take the above here- some of these things don’t impact you if you choose not to have them. Some of them do. Cigarettes and guns do have an impact on others, due to the folks that have them being irresponsible- it goes back to the argument of your rights end where they negatively impact someone else’s.

But on gay marriage, abortions, sex, drugs, porn, alcohol, etc… as a society we can’t seem to keep those opinions about those things to ourselves because of whatever reason. I mostly blame overreaching faith- and if you’ve followed me for any length of time, you know I am absolutely not a fan. My faith is a private, personal thing, and I don’t advocate based on it. You could almost say I’m selfish with it; the insights my faith has provided to me were hard won, and they are mine and mine alone.

The root of the truth is that I truly believe you cannot be given faith; it’s something that you search for and come to terms with. For me to try to tell you about my path is rude; it cheapens your own. I guide no one, and really would prefer that no one try to guide me.

But I’m getting away from my point.

Life isn’t easy. Problems aren’t easy. While it’s commendable to want to help others, most of the time all we can do is listen and let them unburden themselves as caring friends. Sometimes, there’s going to be a suggestion we can offer or a sense of commiseration, but sometimes all you can do is be there and try to walk in their shoes for just a little while, and keep that walk in your mind.

Can you believe I walked all the way through that to tell you that the sometimes all we can offer is empathy and letting folks know they are seen and heard and we’re trying to understand them?

Yeah, me neither. So many words.

A few thoughts on current events- What America is, and can be

~ curiousreadings

I’m going to spare you the lead up, cause at this point, no matter where you are in the world, things are more than a bit on the grim side.

So where I’m going to start is with this sentence- America will be open for business by Easter.

I’m not going to lie, I had to think for quite a while as to why I found this so painfully offensive. Yes, the lack of separation between church and state definitely played a part. But it wasn’t until I got up from the floor where I was playing with my pup that I got it.

You see, Bree will hang on the Mr. Bear with fierce tenacity, and for her, he’s the only thing in the world that matters.

We’ve got people who think that only providing for themselves matters. Or being able to tout a strong, robust economy.

We’ve got people who think anything in this country is available for sale, be it toilet paper or a coronavirus test or the office of the President. They think the most important things are things that really just don’t matter.

Hear that the right way, yes, our people being able to work and take care of their families, that’s extremely important. But also remember the post from a few weeks ago, talking about how taking care of each other could lead to something so much more for all of us? Well, keep thinking down that path with me just a minute.

We’re not a business that can succeed or fail. We’re America- the idea that we can take the best parts of ideas and cultures and create something new, a spirit of innovation while being free to go our own way to find peace and enlightenment within ourselves. That’s who we’ve come from, and who we can continue to be.

We’re not closed for business. We’re preserving that spirit and that people, and it will take as long as it takes.

Not everyone is feeling that way… it’s freakin scary out there, and people are reacting to it. Just looking around myself, people are more prone to argue and find fault, and drive wedges in where we have differences. Now think about that freedom I was just talking about- we have to let each other be free to find our own answers, and not try to make our answers fit everyone else’s problems.

That includes mine, by the way. I’m challenging myself to walk away from the arguments that are so easy to have- on one condition.

Misinformation cannot be permitted to stand. Ignorance and standing on opinions instead of facts- the time to stomach this is over. Antivaxxers, flat earthers, conspriacy theorists.. I won’t go out looking for them, but where they come into my space, they will be shut down.

Because to be free and find your own path is beautiful. To follow a path of sheer stupidity and let it breed hate- that’s what is currently making this situation a thousand times worse than it needs to be.

Rough balance, but you know? I think it can be struck.

Actual conversations at Casa de Wellman-Social Distancing Era

~ curiousreadings

You might have heard about the toilet paper hoarding issue going on in the US. I decided I had THE. SOLVE. for that nonsense.

I bought a bidet on Amazon.

Of course, as I was in the course of trying to get the bidet from my cart to paid for, it sold out. On three different bidets, so clearly I’m not the only one that had that lightbulb moment.

So it came in, and Rick, after a minimum of nagging, installed it.

And came into the room, gesturing at it with mischief.

Rick- It’s ready for the road test.

Me- Oh no no no no. Don’t you remember what happened when Ronny put the new brakes on the van? We put EVERYONE INCLUDING HIM in to test drive it.

Rick- I don’t think that’s going to work for this situation.

Me- But but but… you installed it, you should test it.

Rick- I don’t need to right now. And you said you did, which is why I needed to install it. (I did say minimum of nagging.)

Me- But it’s your work!

Rick- But more of the settings are geared for you. /evil grin

Me- /sigh FINE.

I’m pleased to report that all is in functioning order.

 

Bonus conversation-

Rick offered to take me with him on an errand today, and let me wait in the car. I’m classified high risk, so I’ve been in for the past.. oh.. 19 days or so. But you know, who’s counting?

 

Me- So it’s like I’m getting to go for a ride like I’m a dog?

Rick, grinning- Pretty much.

Me, grumbling but still getting into the truck- It is kind of a nice day.

Rick, watching me stare avidly out the windows at all the signs of spring- I’m almost surprised you aren’t rolling down the windows and sticking your head out.

Me- Imma gonna hafta tell ever’body that I gots to go for me a car ride today. Mebbe I’ll even git to honk the horn!

Cue a truck in front of us almost taking off the front bumper.

Me- I AM AGONNA GIT TO HONK THE HORN! ASSHOLE!

Rick cracked the windows on the way home.

Me- I almost kinda do want to stick my head out.. of course, with my luck, that’s how I’d catch covid.

Rick just laughed.

The Witch’s Daughter- Free from March 16th to March 20th

~ curiousreadings

Maybe I’m getting a little cabin fever. Maybe I’ve been inspired by Disney releasing a whole slew of content early. Maybe I just like having something that I can feel positive about.

Whatever the reason, here’s the important part:

The Witch’s Daughter, the first book in the series, will be available for free from March 16th to March 20th.

The Werewolf’s Daughter, the second book, had a price reduction to $2.99 that will run until March 20th.

Here’s my promise- if I get at least five new reviews between the two books, I’ll drop the price of book 3 (The Maiden) from March 21st to the end of the month.

If you’ve read the books and want to help support, please boost the signal. Share the post- Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, wherever. If you haven’t read the books, and they sound like your thing, please go check them out, and please boost the signal. If you haven’t read the books and they don’t sound like your cup of tea, please boost the signal to those that could get into them.

To everyone who has reached out, shared a post, passed it on, and generally given their support- deeply, madly, truly, honestly thank you. I hope you’ll consider sharing again- whether it’s this post or another artist you’re connected with.

For all the folks that got a copy of The Witch’s Daughter last week…

~ curiousreadings

With everything crazy going on right now and a lot of us looking for some kind of escape or something else to think about, I wanted to do the little I can to help.

Last week, I gave away copies of the first book in Nessa’s story. This week, I’m dropping the price of the second book, The Werewolf’s Daughter, to $2.99. So if you got into the first book and you’re having a good time with it, I hope you’ll consider picking up the second one. And who knows? If folks get into it, I may do the same thing with the last book in the series, too.

Writing is lonely- but it’s the one thing I do that I can point to and say, “I made that happen, that’s my something special going out there.” And the world we’re currently living in is kinda crazy and surreal. If this little story of mine makes you laugh and forget all the weird just for a little while, I hope you’ll tell me. It’d sure make the late nights at the keys worth it. Come to think of it, I finished some of the last chapters of Werewolf’s Daughter during a road trip from California, with my tablet propped up on the truck dash.

And if you hate it, please don’t tell me.

If you want to keep up with me in general, I did claim my author’s page at Amazon.

Oh, one other piece of news that I don’t know how to feel about yet- after everything yall did to boost the signal on Witch’s Daughter last week, I got an offer to turn it into an audiobook. I’m not sure if I’m going to accept it, but it’s interesting all the same. To imagine someone not James Earl Jones doing Cliche and all…

Please take care of yourselves out there, support artists and boost the signals, and most of all, keep reading.