So this… individual.. named Becky Burkett apparently doesn’t like childless people at Disney.
I know this may seem really shocking if you’ve been reading along and just think your devoted blogger is just as fucking cool as a polar bear plunge in January…. I’m not cool. I’m not confident. In fact, I typically have to be slightly coaxed (if not outright bribed) to leave this charming little abode in which about 90% of what I see, hear, smell, and touch was put there because I take pleasure in it. All of the other creatures in the house actually like me, I hope at least 90% of the time.
The short list of places where I feel out of place-
- The park- people don’t like it if you play on the slide or swings and you’re over 30. I’m not saying they’ll card you.. just the STARES pretty much do the job on their own.
- Restaurants. Since covid, I worry I’m not tipping enough or that I’m inadvertently being a pain by wanting to tidy the dishes. Or that I ordered something complicated, and the server is wishing I’d go die in a fire.
- The movies- it’s not like the plane where middle seat gets both armrests… they are all middle seats! WTF gets the armrest! (not gonna lie, been considering booking a buffer seat so it’s never a problem again and I don’t have to crane my neck from an aisle seat to see the screen.
- Retail stores-
- /cough TORRID cough- the mean girls working the counter are usually talking smack about whoever just left before me… what new irritations am I provoking without knowing?
- Bath and Body works- OMG please quit putting stink under my nose that I didn’t ask for! I do not want to smell fucking Dragonfly Shimmer Daydream for the rest of the day!
- Really everywhere on the mall- I don’t care WHY you want my phone number, I don’t fucking want to give it to you. Does it ever occur to you that the fact that your employer is willing to give ridiculous discounts on purchases if you have it means my data is more valuable to them than your product?
Now, I’m not saying Disney parks are my Cheers or anything- but I do enjoy stepping into various fantasy versions of the real world. Where the staff is nice and plays along. Where you get to pick the experience you want, as long as you got that credit card to make your Disney dream come true.
I’m not saying I didn’t see the OG rant on childless people at Disney before.. I did.. and I chalked it up to the old adage.. opinions are like assholes, everyone’s got one.
But this Becky Burkett… she took all this effort to write this article, filled with links about how nutty ‘Disney adults’ are. Didn’t notice the first time? Here’s a few examples-
RELATED: Disney Adults Are Awful Human Beings. And Some Are Barely Human at All
RELATED: Cringe-Worthy Disney Adults Really Are the Worst. Here, See For Yourself
RELATED: Disney Adults & Mental Health: What’s the Connection?
I’m sure I could find Becky’s IG and Twitter and go bonkers at her and call her names. But you know, just like I yield the armrest, tip 30%, and don’t play on the swings anymore… that’s just not something I do. If I’ve learned anything about mean girls in the nearly fifty years of dealing with them, it’s that attention is the key.
So here ya go, Becky Burkett, writer for DisneyDining.com… I hope you enjoy the meager attention from my teensy, rambling blog. I hope you get a laugh out of the fact that I had a long moment of incredulous sadness. I hope the fact that I now understand that there’s more than an unhinged rant about people like me, that there’s actually a whole movement of people like yourself, writing this clickbait articles to convince us to stay home just fills you with glee.
In the end… well, the judge from Office Space said it best.
Curiouser and Curiouser 