Today I had the unenviable pleasure of running some elderly gentlemen with copies of the Watchtower off my property. They were very reluctant to leave, but instead wished to converse on the charms of my courtyard. We exchanged words, and I pointed very firmly while letting them know they were interrupting my work day and they needed. to. go. (Sidenote- I don’t know when the invitation to remove oneself from one’s property became less immediate, but really think that this is a rather pointed sentiment that is not up for discussion or debate.)
Of course the pups were all riled up at this point, and continued to be for quite some time. I peeked out my window, images of Gladys Kravitz dancing in my mind, and saw our stalwart Witnesses continued to peruse the cul de sac, looking into windows, and essentially casing the joints.
Well. During the day, I’m a lone chica at this end of the block, and I’m ornery, and I wasn’t digging them as people. So I did the only thing a bitchy pagan like me can do and busted out my Zoe Firefly prop gun and paced my courtyard with it on my shoulder until our gentlemen got the point.
It only took three circuits. I’m not sure if they were unusually discerning or if somehow in between our conversation and my propping they decided I was somehow intimidating-er, but was glad to see them hop into their white little car and pedal away.
I discussed the event with his Rickness as we headed out to dine this evening- enjoy!
Rick- So do I need to stay home tomorrow and sit out in the courtyard with my P90 in a wifebeater? (Note, his P90 is an airsoft gun, and it doesn’t hurt THAT bad. Mostly.)
Me- holy chao, yes, yes you do.
Rick- I need to get some faked up beer cans.. maybe just lay in some of my root beer bottles and rip the labels off…
Me- YES! We’ll need to go buy you a wifebeater…
Rick- it has to have stains…
Me- We can make it look super authentic with coffee… hey, there’s a storm rolling in in time for balloon fiesta…
Rick- so I’m going to sit in the courtyard with a fake gun and get wet.
Me- It’ll be FUN!
We deserve each other, I know.
Curiouser and Curiouser 